Long have I yearned to skip school.
Oftentimes it seems as though my life revolves around my schoolwork. My day is devoted to procrastinating before doing my homework, my week, waiting for the weekend. Ultimately all I want is the summer, which this year I find cruelly tainted by summer school.
Sometimes I have to remind myself that, in the long run, school is a mere prep for the real world. I could, hypothetically, refuse to go to my classes, and somehow make my living elsewhere. I could deal drugs for the rest of my life, or just work at KFC. The only problem is that would be a stupidly stupid move.
With all of this in mind, perhaps it's no wonder that I've often wanted to just throw my hands in the air one day and abandon school. It would be so easy. Too easy...
1. Essential to the success of my plan would be having Julia and/or Laura involved. The problem is, I'd have to give them a damn good reason for helping me out. Perhaps I could find one, perhaps not, but either way I'd beg. Siblings are useful for some things.
2. Also vital to me going undetected would be picking the right day for the scheme. My dad's usually at work, so he'd be no barrier. My mum usually stays at home, but oftentimes she'll go out in the day for whatever reason. I'd simply have to ask what day she was, say, going to the gym. Then I'd be ready.
I'd also want to pick a day that my sisters were home, assuming that they'd agreed to help me.
3. Once the day was set and the sisters were on board (or weren't), then it would be a simple matter of saying that I was going to bike to school to douse any spark of suspicion my parents might have before it even began. First, I'd casually steal some money from my parents, then away I'd go, heading towards the school.
4. Now we'll leave my frolicking self for a minute and go back home, where my brilliant plan would be executed. The school would soon realize that I was not in attendance, and so would call home to see what's up. That's where my sisters come in, and my mum's absence becomes key. One of my sisters would answer the phone, announce that I'm sick or some such lie, and the school would be convinced. I highly doubt they'd know the difference between my mum's voice and my sister's.
5. As for me, I'd take my stolen money and bike all around town. I might want to go to a candy store for starters, and then move onto places like Second Cup and other retailers of sugary goods. I could bike to the mall, and test my luck at getting in to see a movie. Throughout it all I'd carry my iPad so that I could write about it on the blog, as that would make a thriller of a post.
What about the people who were suspicious of a lone kid walking around on a school day, you ask? Anyone who inquired would be told that my school board had a holiday, and seeing as there are multiple boards they couldn't rightly call me out. Sure, they might stay suspicious, but I doubt any of them would feel so strongly that they'd take committed action against me.
6. After it all, I'd be able to roll into my driveway cooly with no one being the wiser. True, my parents might find out one day. They have a way of finding these things out. Still, I'd have had quite the adventure, and when you factor in he many times I'd laughingly recall the story in my later life, it might just be worth it.
Thanks for reading,
-Mark
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