What I Would do if I Could Talk to my Junior High Self

I think everyone struggles a little bit while they're growing up. Throughout Junior High or Middle School or whatever people call it in their particular part of the world, I think it's the hardest. People are going through puberty, trying to deal with new responsibilities and expectations, and having to deal with people who are far more interested in their own self-image than other people. People are just downright mean at that age, actually.

Personally, I had a very tough time from about age 12-14 in junior high because on top of the other stuff, I was having major troubles with depression. What made it worse was that I was afraid to admit to myself that I was depressed, because I was so afraid of being different or weird or damaged. If I could talk to myself at that time, this is what I would say:

1. It's okay to ask for help. It's difficult, and you may have to be patient and struggle a bit more before things get better, but they can't better if you don't give yourself a chance. Asking for help is the first step.

2. Other people and their opinions don't matter. It's good to care about other people and their feelings, but not to the point where it dictates your life. Don't waste your time with people who make you feel bad about yourself.

3. Put yourself first. Making choices that will take care of you doesn't make you selfish. Care about other people, yes, but at least extend a similar courtesy to yourself.

4. Do things that will make you happy. It's nice to achieve things, but if that doesn't make you happy, it isn't really worth it. Sure, good grades are nice, but life satisfaction is more important in the long run.

5. It's okay to not know things. Growing up is all about figuring out some answers and even more questions. If there weren't questions, your life would be purposeless.

6. Treat everyone with kindness, regardless of how you're feeling. Everyone else could be struggling just as much as you. Don't blame them for being unkind. Instead, feel a little bit sorry for them, and treat them kindly just the same.

7. This is just a short period in your life. Three years won't matter all that much in the long run. Who dated who won't matter, and who was 'popular' won't matter. All that matters is maintaining you and your self worth.

8. This probably all sounds like useless advice, and words don't necessarily help if you can't act on them or believe that they're true. However, at least you can always remember them, and maybe when you're older, you can at least tell yourself "I told you so".

-Laura

(Oh, and as a side note, happy 50th blogpost birthday to our blog!)